Instead of Resolutions, Examine your Priorities

Happy New Year everyone! I, for one, am looking forward to what 2013 brings, and I hope the same is true for you.

Let's talk about resolutions for a moment. Its a fine tradition. But, on the very day everyone is making them, I see stories all over the news telling you that you're just going to break them anyway. While, statistically, that's probably true, it seems like an awfully defeatist attitude. Or - are we just enabling each other? Letting each other off our prospective hooks? If the purpose of a resolution is to improve some aspect of our lives that is important to us, then why are they so easily broken?

THE PREMISE: Our priorities are where we devote our time and our energy. Where we devote our time and energy, quality follows.

Years ago, a wise mentor told me, "you can do a few things well or a lot of things badly." I have passed that on a hundred times, but never really followed his advice myself. I've recently had the opportunity to take a fresh look at how my life was playing out. I realized that I was spread so thin I could barely breathe. I was constantly giving my last ounce of energy to people and causes. And I THOUGHT I was actually pulling it all off. I was SUCH a good person! Does that sound familiar to anyone? I bet it does.

I finally took steps. I actually made a list of the principles that were most important to how I live my daily life. I called it my household creed. I used it to examine the relationships in my life, my commitments, and my direction. It was a revelation! The truth was, I was constantly falling short in just about every area of my life, because I was only giving each about 10% of my energy and attention. And personal well-being? Forget it! There was no "me" in there. And, if by some chance there was, I felt guilty - selfish - for taking the time for myself.

I started making changes immediately. I had some tough conversations with people. I turned off a number of commitments. But, surprisingly, it wasn't that hard. I knew that I wasn't really giving those people my best in the first place. I also knew that those commitments were out of some sense of social obligation, rather than because they were highly important to me personally.

Now - reality has to set in here. Most of us have to work to feed, clothe, and house ourselves and our families. THOSE are always priorities. But, if the energy you're devoting to playing workplace politics isn't in line with what really matters to you, then have you considered entering a "maintenance mode" with your career? Where can that time, energy, and devotion be better spent? Are there other activities, expenses, or commitments you could trim to give you more latitude to focus on what's truly important?

This year, before you make a list of resolutions of additional things you "should" be doing (or doing better), take a few minutes (or days - this is your life we're talking about) to examine your priorities. Write them down. Then, look at what your time and energy over the past year say about whether you're being true to them. If they're out of whack - make a course correction. THAT's a resolution everyone should be able to keep.